‘Big John’ Murray Needs a Heart Transplant – 2023 – VIDEO – Rock of Love – Bret Michaels
Room 6233 has been my “Hospital Home” for so long over the last few years. Today I leave it in the hopes of getting a new heart elsewhere at another hospital that’s known for its transplants and cardiac care. This is about as emotional as I’ve been in awhile. To say I’m terrified is an understatement. Hopefully the next time I see this hallway it’s in celebration of a new heart with those that got me here. To the amazing staff at UC 6-South I love you all and to the one and only Dr Ahmad I love ya Doc and thanks for everything. See yall soon.
I have what’s called dilated cardiomyopathy. What that is, is an enlargement of the heart, the internal part and the external part of the heart. It is directly attributed to alcohol and drug abuse which I used to self-medicate for stuff that happened when I was in the Marines in Somalia. I never believed in PTSD. I thought it was an excuse, and something that people made up. Well, when my dad died in 2009, a lot of things, for whatever reason, my mind blocked out and forgot about, came back. I mean they came back like a tidal wave, which is one of the reasons I started drinking so much. It was perfect timing with the TV show and everything. The drinking and drugs went out of control. There were two reasons. One was the notoriety from the show, and two was because I was trying to forget things. It was the only way I could go to sleep.
So, this dilated cardiomyopathy is a direct result of alcohol and drug abuse attributed to PTSD. What that means is I have an ejection fraction of 10%. That means my heart is only expelling oxygen or blood at a rate of 10% when it should be 70-80%. The long story short is that my heart is only working at 10% of its capacity. What had happened is that over the last five years….it started with what I thought was a panic attack when I was in Hawaii snorkeling and saw a shark. It turned out to be heart failure, in fact. That was the first one. Since then, I have had numerous reoccurrences…a total of five heart attacks in conjunction with heart failure.
My heart has gotten continuously weaker every time that happened. It’s at a point where it’s not going to get any better. In order to live another five, ten or twenty years, they have to do a heart replacement. It scared the living hell out of me, but with the more research I’ve done I’ve found out that it’s not that big of a deal medically anymore. They do so many of them now.